Splish Splash - I'll Never Do that Again

(Photo from Dan Zen)
The day I decided to quit playing Truth or Dare was March 8th, 1999. I had just turned twenty years old the day before. My actual birthday was reserved for my family while the day after was reserved for my friends.

Every year on the day after my birthday, my friends; Shannon, Floyd and Rand threw me a party. This one promised to be a great one. Rand and Floyd had rented us a cabin in Gatlinburg (that is in the Great Smokey Mountain National Park in Tennessee.)

We were going to spend three days in the cabin, floating in the hot tub, going down and exploring the town and even one day at one of the tourist traps nearby. Well, Shannon and I first got there around two in the afternoon, the boys hadn’t arrived yet, but we set to making the place feel like home.

Shannon had made a ton of finger foods and snacks for us and we were putting those away when the guys arrived. With them they had a keg and several brown paper bags filled with high octane drinks.

Now, I might have only been twenty years old, but we were going to be secluded, safe and in a cabin in the middle of the woods. What would it hurt if I had a few drinks? At least, that is what I thought at the time.

The boys set up a “cocktail bar” for the four of us. They had gotten several different kinds of juice, a few different liquors and, of course, there was that keg. I never did like to drink beer. Anyway, once we had our little party all set up and the others had arrived.

There were a total of eleven of us and we all had a drink or two under our belts, someone suggested that we play Truth or Dare. I’m not saying it was me, but I do know it was one of us and it wasn’t any of the others.

I’m just saying… The way we were going to play the game was you chose truth or dare, if you chose truth and didn’t want to answer it, you had to take a shot and do a dare. If you didn't want to do the dare, you had to take another shot and give up your turn.

So far, there had been a few truths; we learned Floyd had never kissed his first girlfriend, Sadie DID have that nose job we all suspected and Shannon really didn’t own her car.

No one had done a dare, but already there had been twelve shots taken and it was my turn. Rand looked me straight in the eye and asked, “Truth or Dare?”

I wasn’t in a very truthful mood so I chose dare. I knew Rand wouldn’t do me wrong, he was one of my best friends, right?

Well, seems a best friend can do you wrong, at least as far as Truth or Dare is concerned. By this time, I had gotten nice and tipsy and couldn’t quite walk a straight line.

My dare, from my very loving friend Rand was to climb up on top of the porch and do a dive into the hot tub.

Everyone, even me, expected me to just take a shot, laugh and go on to the next person. Ten minutes later, I was standing on top of the porch, Floyd right beside me. He kept telling me I didn’t have to do it, that I should just take that shot.

I am pretty sure I said I’d take that shot… but the next thing I knew I was floating down through the air, straight for that bubbling tub of water. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in a big puddle of water beside the hot tub, ten worried faces were staring down at me and Shannon was yelling at me.

It took me a minute to realize what she was yelling, but I think she was trying to figure out if I had amnesia because she was asking things like, “What day is it, where are you from, who is the president?”

I groaned, wrapped one arm around my head and pointed with my wire framed glasses at the nearest person and asked, “Have you seen my glasses? I was looking for my glasses…”

For some reason, we spent the rest of that night at the hospital and I never, ever played Truth or Dare again. After all, if I hadn’t been playing, I wouldn’t have fallen, would I?

Stuck on a Cliff

by Martin
(Richmond, KY)

(Photo from Ulises Gonzalez)
When I was 21, I was camping with a few friends at a local beach area and we brought some beer along with us.

We had been drinking for a few hours when we all decided to go down to the beach and swim for about an hour and sit around in the sand talking to each other.

We got down to the beach and we were all pretty drunk, before we all started going swimming we sat around and was chatting and someone brought up the idea to play truth or dare.

I didn't want to play at first but I joined in after the first few rounds.

For the first twenty minutes or so the game was quite boring, there were only mostly truths and a few laughs and maybe a dare or two.

Eventually I got a dare and someone had dared me to climb this huge rock cliff that was about 200 yards away from us. Me, being drunk and foolish, I decided to do it to show off, so I stumbled over to the base of the cliff and began my decent.

At first I almost gave up because the rocks were sharp and a few girls from the group were trying to talk me out of it but once I started to climb there was no going back.

From far away, the cliff didn't seem very high but once I made it about halfway up, I looked down and realized the mistake I had made.

I thought to myself if only I could make it to the top the others could go around and help me up from the top, but then the reality sank in.

I was stuck! I panicked and the group had to end up calling the park ranger to come help me down.

It was a story to remember luckily we didn't get into too much trouble over the incident but I learned my lesson!

Losing everything in Thailand

by Randall
(Brooklyn, NY, USA )

(Photo from Dan Moyle)
I had been in Thailand for two days when I met a group of truly irresponsible revelers. We left the hostel for a night out and immediately started drinking heavily.

As we were leaving, an older man at the hostel told me not to bring anything I want to have with me the next day. I called him a fear monger and brought my iPhone to take pictures, as well as my wallet with two credit cards in it.

I remember going into a music club and dancing with a group of people for several hours while chugging beers. Then my memory jumps. At four, I was dancing, and the next thing I knew, it was light out and I was on the street trying to hail an auto rickshaw to get back to the hostel.

The driver made fun of me the whole way for being drunk. I passed out at the hostel and woke up at three in the afternoon, having taken all of my clothes off in my sleep, in a coed room of ten people.

Looking through my luggage and storage locker, I realized that I had lost my iPhone and both my credit cards, as well as my glasses, my driver’s license, and 70 dollars’ worth of Thai money. I went down to the common room and started piecing together the night with my fellow travelers.

Apparently, we had rushed out of the bar I last remember because one of the members of our party had punched and off duty police officer who was working as a bouncer at the bar. We had all split off and run in different directions, so no one knew what each other had done, although I did notice that there was a bit of pad Thai in the pocket of the jeans I had worn out.

Apparently I had gotten hungry at some point. I don't know what I was doing by myself for three hours in Bangkok, but I do know I should have listened to that fear monger!

The Secret Admirer

(Photo from Metro Centric)
I can remember having a lot of embarrassing moments playing truth or dare while drinking. What I am having trouble remembering is those moments without adult content.

One evening my friends and I were playing the game. My best friend Kim was there with me as always. Her nick name was wild card Kimmie.

There was also this really creepy guy named Marc. We didn’t know much about him but he was always around. He always tried to ask the girls out and was shot down in a second.

One evening we dared Kim to write a message to Marc using lipstick on his windshield. So Kim being the crazy girl she is went right to it. She grabbed my most expensive lipstick and started writing Marc a message while he was passed out.

She told Marc how attracted she was to him and hot he was. After she wrote the message Marc woke up the next morning and went out to his car. He came running back in bragging about this person who really had a “thing” for him.

For a few weeks after Marc road around with the message on his windshield. Come to find out the lipstick had FROZE on his windshield and he could not get it off. It was in the low thirties those few weeks.

After Marc finally got the lipstick off he was mad as hell. All he could do was try to find out who wrote the note on his windshield. Every time we played truth or dare after that with Marc, no one would take the truth option when Marc was up.

Finally out of nowhere one night this equally creepy girl comes into a local bar we were at and falsely confesses she put the message on his windshield!!!! We were all like “WHAT?!?!?” So Marc decides to go off on this poor girl and told her he would never go out with her because of the lipstick freezing.

The nerdy girl flips him the finger and walks away. To this day Marc still thinks it was the nerdy creepy girl who wrote the message and has not had anyone ask him out or accept a date from him.

We all feel bad but can’t help to crack up every time we talk about it. Marc told off the only girl that would probably ever go out with him….

I Regret the Time I Was Playing Truth or Dare

by Bradley James

(Photo from West Midlands Police)
I was playing this so called game of Truth or dare with a group of my highschool friends to this day! There I was drunk on my butt when I got the Dare to streak through the local city park, in the dark.

Well, I didn't think it would be so bad, considering it was dark and there was no one in the park, or so I thought. My friend’s house was just across the street from the park, so I stripped down to nothing, took another shot of whiskey before I braved myself to go do this and I off I went.

My friends stood out in the driveway and out on the sidewalk and were just cracking up, laughing profusely. I ran across the street, entered the park and started running from one end to the other when all of a sudden a flash light appears and it is facing my private parts!!

I was like, oh my God, who the heck is that and why are they facing that flash light on me and my privates! I figured it was one of my friends and I started yelling and cursing at the person.

I told, whoever it was, to get that light off of me and my private area immediately!

That person turned out to be a local police officer.

In fact, it was Officer Ribble, who knew me and my family extremely well!!

He yelled out, "Brad, is that you?"

I wanted to climb up a tree and act like a monkey at that point but I knew that would really hurt, especially in certain areas of my body, more than others!

What the heck to do?

I wasn't sure what to do! So I ran like a rabbit, just as fast as I could. I knew I couldn't run back to my friend’s house because I'd have to run right past him, so I ran home! Keep in mind, I am underage, drunk and naked!

I get to my back yard, not knowing if he followed me or ran after me, I never looked back, and there was my older sister, making out with her boyfriend! Who else is going to see my privates I thought!!

My sister screams, thinking I am some kind of pervert or intruder and I try to tell her to shut up before we create an audience, when suddenly the back porch light goes on and there stands my Mother!

You have got to be kidding me! She asks what the heck we are doing in the yard!! All she sees is me naked and my sister and her boyfriend fully clothed, sitting in shock!

She yells out, "Bradley James, you get in this house right now and get in your room and put some clothes on, right now!!"

What a buzzkill I tell ya!

Sobered up real fast!!

She then proceeded to ground me for pranking my sister and her boyfriend!!! She never found out about the park! To this day, Officer Ribble looks at me differently, but he never said anything about the night in the park!!!

To Be or Not to Be

by Joe
(USA)

(Photo from led_head101 via Flickr)
What a Question when you are Drunk There was a time in college when I went out drinking with my college friends. In these days you needed to stick together with the guys. Now normally I don't do this, as I don't like to drink but my friends convinced me to go out.

Because you see they had decided to do a trick on me and needed to make it look like what happened next wasn't planned. My name is Joe and this happened when I went to school at the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana, IL, of course in the U.S.

So back to my story, apparently my friends were experienced drinkers because they knew what alcoholic drink to give me. And in about a half an hour, I felt tipsy for the first time in my life. And you know what happens when you get tipsy, reality is changed.

You start believing everyone is your friend and likes you. But what they had planned for me, you wouldn't wish on any friend.

First let me tell you what happened and then I will explain how they did it. After they saw I had enough, at the restaurant a very sexily dressed young woman, another student, a person I had never met before, all of a sudden started to give me a lot of attention.

Now at this early stage in my life, I was just a very intelligent young man but I never had the attention of such a beautiful young woman. And with all caution given to the wind and having not had a young man ever, you could say I was acting quite loose.

Then this pretty thing decides to sit on my lap all of a sudden and then I couldn't help myself - I was, let’s say not behaving as a gentlemen.

Then the next thing I know, there is a police officer sitting at a table in the restaurant kind of to the back, and he comes up and doesn't seem to please about what is going on.

He actually, if I recall correct seemed quite pissed and then all of a sudden, the young woman runs out so the police officer can't catch her but being drunk, I am a sitting duck.

So I get taken to jail as my friends are laughing their heads off. I just don't understand why the policeman is taking me when it was this young woman who initiated everything. So there I am depressed in jail - with some other tough looking thugs in the same jail cell with me.

By now I am starting to come out of my liquor stupor and then all of a sudden I see all my buddies come to my cell with the young woman and the police officer and I learned they had paid these actors a little money and some drinks to pull this gag on me.

Being Jewish what can I say but oi vai and will I never get drunk again and trust my buddies!!

The Truth of What Happened At the Flying X Saloon

(Photo from joaquin uy)
Now I never drink without eating, so in order for me to even think about getting plastered the establishment has to offer food service. I always ordered chicken nuggets every time I went there, but this time I was feeling daring.

With my girls in town, I told myself it was time for something new. So I ordered the chili cheese fries. That was mistake number 1 of the night. You see my conclusion was always that if you ate before you drank, the effects would be minimized.

My new conclusion is roughly the same but with the minor exception of eating chili cheese fries. I drank what I normally do when I go out which is rum and coke. I don’t drink anything besides that. I do believe the bartender added extra shots of rum into my glass, but I could be wrong.

Did I mention yet that it was karaoke night at the bar?

I don’t sing in front of people, but again I was with my girls so I decided to try something new. I grabbed the book filled with a list of songs to choose from which was mistake number 2.

I had agreed to sing a duet with Maggie, and I must admit I remember vaguely singing it, but after that my mind is nothing but a black hole.

Did I mention mistake number 3 yet?

I remember giving my phone to Samantha as I was starting to feel tipsy. I have a bad habit of drunk texting, and didn’t want to make any stupid mistakes.

This story concludes when for reasons unknown to me I decided to get up on the stage and sing For Your Entertainment by Adam Lambert.

Now the only reason I know that this is what I sang is because Samantha took my phone and videotaped it.

I not only got up on the stage and sang the song, but I danced to it as well using a chair I grabbed as a sexual prop. To make matters worse, towards the end of the song I tripped on the microphone cord and fell into the table in front of me.

No one was hurt, and I got up laughing.

As I went to turn to walk back to my table I ended up stopping and throwing up on a 55 year old gentleman in front of me.

The morale of the story: never eat chili cheese fries when you drink and never ever give away your phone if you have any intention of doing karaoke.

Oh needless to say though, to this day Abby still doesn't know what happened that night.

My First Time Drinking Story

by Jack

(Photo from Simon Welsh)
Two years ago we went for camping outside of my city, near Orlando. It was me (Jack), Nina, Jim and John.

We went outside the city to have our lunch and maybe play some games together. They just started drinking and they asked me if I want to try.

I was so upset that day so I told them yes why not. Although it was my first time, they gave me 7 shots and it was a lot for me.

After the 7th shot, I started walking around and say funny things. The worst part was me having a cigarette in my hands. It was my first time smoking cigarettes too.

There was a hole with water in it near us. It has no heights but for me it was like a huge pool and I was swimming in it.

I couldn't remember any of these after that, but my friends still making fun of me for that behavior. They say that at that time I was so scared about swimming in that pool.

I was calling Nina to help me and after that laughing out loud. I was repeating the phrase “boy I am so hyper”. I do not even know the meaning of this phrase.

After a day, I felt embarrassed about my behavior in front of my friends but when I saw that they are acting so cool about it, it became something OK for me. Honestly, I will not drink that much of liquor never ever again.

However, I feel like it is sometimes necessary for me to forget about everything and only have fun with my friends. I am not sure that is the way I have to do it but at least I am sure my friends will have a lot of fun having me around.

The First Time I Was Ever Drunk

by Gabriel Christo
(St. Louis, MO)

(Photo from 55Laney69 )
My most embarrassing drunk moment occurred when I was drunk for the first time ever. It was a few days after I had turned 21! I had never drank before but always wanted to try it.

So, I thought to myself, "Why not go all in for my first time?!"

So, after work one day, I went to the liquor store and bought me a gigantic bottle of Jack Daniels Tennessee Whiskey. When I went up to the cash register to purchase it, the cashier gave me a funny look. Like he knew I was an amateur.

I guess I just gave off an aura. Not that he was wrong! So, I get back to my mom's with a bottle of Jack. She was at an important work meeting in Springfield, so I had the whole house to myself all night.

So, an excited me opens the bottle and starts chugging it straight. Or, at least I tried. A couple of gulps and I gagged. So, I just started taking sips. Little sips from the bottle here and there.

Slowly, I got drunker and drunker. My sips got bigger and bigger. I got drowsier and drowsier. The next thing I know I wake up on the living room floor with a pain in my arm. I took a quick look at it and saw that I got a nasty cut.

Then I realized I was naked, with nothing but a blanket covering me. I looked to my side, there was the living room chair, knocked over. My mouth was dry. I felt incredibly sick. I could barely move!

Suddenly, I hear footsteps. My mom walks in! She was already back? How! I looked at the clock, and realized I was out for 15 hours! My mom looks at me with a smarmy look and says, "I didn't want you to get cold, so I put a blanket on ya!"

She pulls out the bottle of Jack Daniels, 3/4 empty and sets it on the table. "I hope you learned your lesson!" she said. I did. I never drank Jack Daniels again.

I'm a Jagger guy now!

Last Man Standing

(Photo from pixonomy via Flickr)
I had only been living in Binghamton, New York, for about two years when I went to a Halloween party with my girlfriend Sue that some coworkers from McDonalds of mine were having.

Even though I was underage (as were a large majority of the party goers) there was PLENTY of alcohol.

There was a full keg, a few cases of wine coolers, plenty of straight liquor and a large bowl of what they called "bug juice", which was numerous different liquors mixed in with Hawaiian Punch.

I started drinking right after I got there, as did Sue. I only weighed about 180 at the time and wasn't exactly what you'd call a heavy-weight drinker but I put a fair-sized dent in the party supplies.

The evening ended with me and a coworker having a drinking contest, doing matching shots of something called "Devil Spring's Vodka", which is a 180 proof alcohol.

I was the last person standing at that party, but only because I passed out at the same time as the other person and when he slumped to the floor he leaned up against me and held me up for a few seconds.

Sue pretty much carried me to her sister's house, where we spent the night, and when I woke up I had a hangover, and even now I've never had a worse hangover.

I went to bed that night thinking with some relief that when I woke up the next day the hangover would be gone, but that wasn't the case... that hangover hung onto me for almost the entire next day.

This happened in 1988, and Sue is now my wife. We still, when talking about various misadventures of our youth, will talk about this party and always end up laughing about how drunk I got and about how she basically carried me to her sisters.